Now what?

I can’t believe I didn’t share my good news here. I found out last week that my biopsy came back benign! I’m still waiting for my copy of the pathology report to see exactly what it was that the MRI picked up…but whatever it was it’s officially not cancer and not suspicious!

With the clear biopsy result, I’ve officially been given a clean bill of health for now. While I’m trying to take a little time to bask in this knowledge and breathe a giant sigh of relief, it’s hard not to fast forward to thinking about next steps.

It’s obviously too early to carve a plan into stone, but I’ve been working on a rough outline of how I’m hoping to proceed. Right now I’m 33 years old…rounding the corner to 34. I’m planning on following my doctors’ recommendation to do the ovary removal around my 35th birthday. That’s one thing I feel pretty certain about.

Here’s the rub. The big 3-5 is a mere 15 months away, and my spouse and I are very much hoping we can have another child before that point. You all can do simple math, I assume. You hear that sound? Oh yes, that’s time ticking away. So basically we’re planning to jump straight into TTC (trying to conceive) and cross our fingers that we can make it happen before the end of 2017.

In my dream scenario I’d love to have a baby some time next summer and do my BSO (tube & ovary removal) a few months later (not right away because it stops breast milk production and I’d like to get a brief period of nursing in if possible). Then sometime in 2018 I’d like to do the PBM (prophylactic bilateral mastectomy).

There are so many variables in this scenario that I have zero control over, and I honestly don’t know if it is going to be possible. And there’s so much stress and anxiety around the idea of TTC now that I know my BRCA+ status (I’m sure I’ll write more about in the near future). But for now, I’m trying to relax and work on seeing how well I can get reality to line up to my fantasy.


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